Friday, April 24, 2009


There exists a Mystery, much larger than I am. I have spoken of this Mystery before. It is what pointed me to South Africa. It is what has confirmed to me that our situation with Lily is exactly where we’re supposed to be. That confirmation continues today.

Last Friday, I wrote about the story of the stones in my bookbag and how the final stone turned into a butterfly. It was not the butterfly that became my “symbol” but rather the metamorphosis itself—the transformation from something cold and hard and seemingly hopeless into something beautiful and full of hope. I also wrote about the book I received, When the Heart Waits, and I told about how my favorite poet’s quote was printed as an introductory quote—“Patience is everything.” I concentrated more on the giving over to God and the patience.

On Monday, I sat down to really get into the book. Kidd is going through a mid-life crisis, and she’s walking in the cold, trying to figure her life out. She comes upon a cocoon. . .and a realization. For any change her life is desperately craving, she’s going to have to wait. For the transformation to occur, she’s going to have to patiently sit in her soul’s cocoon before the butterfly will appear. There’s butterfly reference #2.

I get to school today and find that my assistant has made a quilt for Lily. It’s a beautiful quilt. She points out that there’s an inscription at the bottom. It reads “For Lily With Love” but beside the inscription was an embroidery of a butterfly. I asked her if she had read my blog about the butterfly. She had not. Butterfly #3.

I told her the story. While I was telling the story, I looked over to the side. There was a book sitting on a book cart. The title? The Lamb and the Butterfly, by Eric Carle. Butterfly #4.

We had a presenter in the library for our fourth grade students this morning. While I was turning my projector and laptop off, I looked on the cart that both are on. There was a wand of some sort (I think the presenter used it as a pointer), but the top of the wand was formed into. . . you guessed it. . .a butterfly. Butterfly #5.

I had to go help a teacher with her projector. I knocked on her door, looked up, and lo and behold, there’s a butterfly mobile. Butterfly #6!

Now, you might argue that my senses are now heightened to butterflies and that’s why I’m seeing them all over the place. That may be the case, but maybe my senses are supposed to be heightened to them. I believe that I am to learn something from them. I believe that with my heart, my soul, my mind, and all of my strength!

What to learn? Could it be that I am to be patient and let this little butterfly within me emerge in her own sweet time? Or could this be a prediction of some sort that little Lily will have, herself, transformed from the T-18 caterpillar into a healthy baby? Maybe it’s a reminder that the grieving that may occur will need its own time to heal and for me not to rush it. Yes, my senses are heightened, but so is my perception. I will be on the lookout for more butterflies, but more, I will be tuned in to what I can learn from them. The Great Mystery would have it no other way.

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