Dread

I'm afraid of today.

Lily's stomach scan is this morning. That's not what I'm afraid of. Actually, I'm hoping we'll get some answers from this.

I'm afraid because this scan could take up to four hours, and Soleil will be with us. Then, Lily has an appointment with the GI to follow up the scan.

That's at least six hours out of my comfort zone. No comfy chairs to nurse Soleil; no walls to hide behind if Lily vomits when I feed her. Nope. Just a double stroller and arms that will probably have to make sure Lily stays on her table while their holding a fidgety little baby. Probably a moment where I have to nurse an infant and tube-feed at the same time.

And I know I can do this. I've done similar countless times before. Still, I dread today.